It's been a year...

It's been about year since I've written. I have been sitting at my kitchen table drinking tea and eating pretzels trying to figure out how I could reintroduce myself and my life, but I decided to just start back in the middle of it all. I will provide a short recap and move on: 

1. We bought our first home in the suburbs. (We no longer live on Libscomb Street but I am keeping the name because it is where it all started and it is such a special place for me.) 

Mike building a deck in our backyard. It's our favorite place. 

2. Our church now meets in a movie theatre every Sunday.
We are growing little by little and having a blast! God has brought amazing people with amazing hearts. 

Mike preaching with the big screen behind him. 

3. We had a baby! His name is Gideon Ben Gerald and he was born June 16th of this year. We are completely in love. 

My Sweet Boy.

I'd say thats been a pretty good year. I just might be a different person...

Clean & Bright

"Better keep yourself clean and bright; you are the window through which you see the world."  - George Bernard Shaw

The first time I ever read this quote was in a bible class in high school. I was meticulously keeping a journal at the time and saw this quote in small letters in the margin of my textbook. I wrote the quote in big letters in the middle of one of my journal pages. I felt it was important enough to have one whole page of its own. It was the kind of quote that felt like when a song gets stuck in your head.

These words have quietly reappeared in the margins of my life during different experiences and circumstances I have faced over the years. I always thought it was strange because it is not a scripture and it probably was not meant to be amazingly spiritual. Maybe God just liked the way the British playwright (George Bernard Shaw) put things. Does God use the elegant words of creative people to redirect our eyes toward the Father? Is this even allowed? I've always just let it happen. 

Things have not come easily this year. Lots of change, lots of effort, lots of realizing that things sometimes just don't work out like you think they will. I hear people sometimes refer to these hard times as the "real world." The harsh and disappointing realities of adulthood. I would be lying if I told you that things have just been peaches, kittens, and lighting bugs these past few months. 

There is something that happens to you when you come to terms with the fact that some things might not be as accessible or attainable as you thought. When you become closely acquainted with the word No. When options become slim. When there is not much else that can be done. 

I remember where I was when this happened. I had just found out about another job opportunity falling through and I was sitting in a metal church chair looking at my sink full of dirty dishes. It was sunny and my dog was eating. The world didn't stop for me.

This may sound strange but I felt like something in my soul aged, hardened, and turned a grayish color. The color of my sink. I felt like I lost the sweet and shiny belief in amazing stories and things that are possible. It was a hollow and terrible feeling. I remember wondering if this was the real world that everyone talks about. 

I know this all sounds so gloomy, but I wonder if anyone else can relate to an experience like this. 

I think there are different reactions to this experience. Some people (like my Mike) become highly motivated by this challenge and decide to retaliate. Others take it more slowly and personally in an effort to process and analyze the issue from all angles (this person happens to be more like myself). Either way there comes a decision.

What do we do with this? Do we close up, put our heads down, and work until our hearts and hands are dry? 

Or do we fight to stay clean and bright? 

Do we persevere to stay wide open?

I believe that this is part of the race that Paul so passionately talks about in the scriptures. I believe that God invites us to an abundant life right in the middle of the realities of life. I am finding it just takes some work, and discipline on our part to take part.

What if life really does have bright possibilities and joyful hopes all along? What if the real world was more about fighting to keep your eyes open and your heart soft than embracing the way things have to be?

I am still sorting these questions out in my own mind, and I feel the Spirit asking me about what I will do. 

His Plan

Before the Task

         I remember the first time I ever saw my husband. I was just coming home with my best friend and he was sitting on my couch with my big brother. I gave him a quick side glance and told myself no. When I first heard that he was coming to do a summer internship at our church, I was resolved not to date a guy who went to Wesley College. These guys always seemed to date sisters and it always ended in broken hearts (haha). Years later, I realize they aren't so bad after all. Many of these guys are now our close friends. 

        What won me was how incredibly easy it was for me to talk to him. I was struck by how completely honest he was. He saw things as they were and was not afraid to say it. I loved this, but it also made me nervous (haha). He was confident, clever, he knew what he wanted, and if you talked with him long enough you would realize that he genuinely loved people and worked hard to be a loyal friend. I feel like he really saw me that summer. He wasn't afraid to ask questions. 

In the end, I fell for a Wesley College guy in my own kitchen ...how could I have been so reckless (haha)!!

        In our three years of marriage I am learning new things about him that I love. I am amazed at his humble heart and the fact that he is teachable. He challenges me here, because I am the kind of the person that wants to be good at something the first try. But he doesn't mind to learn, in fact he welcomes it, and most people don't know this about him when they first meet him. Mike is also genuinely happy most days. I know this may be a hilarious point to bring up, but all I know is that we have fun, and we laugh, and we move on when we fight, mostly because he is positive. Even though my emo/ deep thinking/ the world's gonna end side gets frustrated I am so grateful for his attitude. It changes the tone in our house. 

          As we have pursued church planting, we are beginning to see new things come to the surface. I have had the privilege of seeing a more vulnerable side of Mike in the past few months. There are a lot of decisions to make, a lot questions people are asking, and a lot of answers we just don't have. Sometimes we feel like we are 'making it up as we go along' (to quote the infamous Indiana Jones). We are learning that a good bowl of cereal is as good a dinner as any. That sometimes jobs don't just happen. We are learning what church really is, and Who the church belongs to. I'll be the first to say that church planting has already put us to the test in many ways already. But one thing that I admire most about Mike in this season of our lives is his vulnerable and resilient bravery. It takes a brave person to resist making decisions based on fear and deadlines. It takes a brave person to take his eyes off the task and put them on Christ (someone who is invisible, and sometimes really quiet). It takes a brave person to not turn to a plan B at the edge of the unknown. It takes a brave person to say that it is ok if they don't know, if they don't get the credit, if they don't have the answers all the time. It is this quality that makes me confident that I would follow Mike anywhere. 

I say all this not to just brag on Mike (even though I am totally ok with doing that), but to remind myself that I loved Mike before all that we had to do. 

Before the sermons, before the outreaches, before moving to Texas, before planting a church. 
I fell in love with just him. I don't love him more because he has titles or experience. These things just bring out what God was already putting inside of Him. My love grows the more time we have together. 

I loved Mike before the task, and this makes me sure that I will love him after. 

 'The Office.'  

Lancaster Avenue

There is a street near downtown Fort Worth called Lancaster Avenue. Most everybody in Fort Worth knows about this particular street. In one area the street is lined with homeless shelters and resource centers. When Mike and I first moved to Fort Worth we drove through this area and were overwhelmed with the amount of people we saw huddled at the doors of these shelters with all their belongings stuffed in black garbage bags. This overwhelmed feeling, turned to burden, that eventually turned into action. 

A couple in our launch team connected us with a woman named Marcia who has been serving in this area for many years now. She usually takes young people out to hand out pizza and tube socks to anyone who will take them. She also makes a point to have real conversations with these people about what is important to them. She is enthralling to watch. She asks them questions, holds their hands, prays for them, understands them. She gives those without homes dignity and points them to Christ. She says, "They are just people who are down on their luck...just people like us." 

One of my biggest fears in ministry is the inability to relate. I fear this more than speaking or even leading. Sometimes those in need have tragic stories and overwhelming experiences that they cope with every day. Sometimes those in need live in the cold and only think about survival. Sometimes those in need had no choice within their circumstances. They were betrayed, abandoned, broken, and forgotten. So when a person says, "What right have you to tell me anything. You don't know what I've been through." I would have to say, "You're right. I don't know." Conversation over. How effective was that... This is the ultimate call out...This is scary to me. 

I have to be honest and say that sometimes this fear has caused me to close my eyes and turn the other way. But this is the greatest tragedy of all. 

I am coming to understand that feeling like I can't relate to those in need is not a good enough excuse. 



It. Is. Not. Good. Enough. This excuse is for those who choose to be blind. 

I am coming to understand that all people relate because they are people. It is the circumstances and the experiences that may not be the same. I could have ended up under a bridge, or waiting to get into a shelter just like the next guy. We are people, we make decisions, we make mistakes, and things just happen. We are all in need.   

I was praying about this insecurity this past week and was convicted when I felt the Lord ask me this question: What would have happened to us if God would have said, "I don't think I will pursue humanity because I just don't really relate to them." 

God loved then pursued. 

For God so loved the world that He gave...

This brings great hope and freedom for those who feel locked in insecurity. 

We have the freedom to believe we aren't better than anyone. 

This means that if you love Christ, if you are burdened for those in need, if you love others, if you feel the call....this is all you need. 

This past Sunday Marcia took our launch team out to pass out pizza and care packages we had assembled earlier in the month. We followed her under bridges, up and down Lancaster, and into some of their homeless camps. It was pouring rain and freezing and exhilarating and real and we were happy. We were changing, we were relevant, we were like Jesus. 

We are loved. We love. We pursue. 

Little Kid Dog

This is Charlie. He is about 4 months old and has been an interesting addition to our little home. Mike and I found him on Craigslist this past January. I will never forget taking him home for the first time. He was a tiny fur ball that didn't make a sound and I was in love. He sat really still in my lap all the way home.... and Oh how this has changed...

Charlie is a miniature Australian shepherd. This breed is really smart and active. He is so attentive and I swear he understands what I am saying 99% of the time. He loves Mike and follows him around the house. He is also a herder dog. When we walk him he tries to heard all the runners that pass by. 

Charlie's accomplishments:

1. He knows how to sit

2. He knows how to come

3. He knows how to swim

 (We didn't know this until he jumped out of our kayak into the middle of a lake!)

4. He almost knows where to go to the bathroom

5. He has all his bottom teeth

This little kid dog has brought a lot of joy to our day to day. He has also caused us to learn the art of extreme patience at times. We love him, sweet Charlie. 

Inspiring Makers

I entered into a valentines loop giveaway last night on Instagram and came across a treasure trove of inspiring makers. I wanted to share my finds. Check them out! 

1. @wearableplanter 

Colleen Jordan designs beautiful planter necklaces and seed bombs. 

www.wearableplanter.com 

2. @anvilcreekco

This is a company based out of New South Wales. They create all natural soy wax candles

www.etsy.com/au/shop/AnvilCreekCo

3. @hello.halsted

Stephanie Jones creates unique titanium post earrings out of Chicago.

www.hellohalsted.etsy.com 

People in my room

Two Saturdays ago there were 30 people packed in my 750 square foot apartment.

I honestly was doubting if this would be possible.

I was proved wrong.

Mike and I hosted our January launch team party at our house. Our launch team parties are simple get togethers with every one who is committed or just plain interested in planting a church with us. It is chance to meet new people, catch up with old friends and make new ones. This last one was probably one of our best ones yet. We packed as many fold up chairs as possible along the edges of our living room. We also opened up the french doors to our bedroom and put some chairs in there too. It was madness, but fantastic madness. 

I found that this particular meeting put me to the test in some ways. As I was cleaning before the party I was realizing that every part of my house would most likely be on display. A large group of people would see the empty grey walls in our bedroom ( I plan on hanging pictures). They would see the sloppily painted paneling, and the fact that the refrigerator door is hooked on the wrong way. They would see our cheap target comforter and maybe notice that our pillow cases do not match in the least. The only thing that was not on display that night was our clothes closet in the farthest corner of our bedroom. I will not disclose to you what was packed in there to make room for everyone. 

There was a point during the evening when I was sitting on my bed with several other people ( it was being used as another piece of sitting furniture) and thinking, 

"There are so many people in my room..." 

Before I could figure out if this was ok with me or not, I realized that being in someone's room is something personal. It's usually a quiet place that is invitation only. If you're like me, it is a place where you quickly shove stuff before people come over. It is sometimes the place where you cry without reservation and fight most loudly. It is the place of rest when you are sick. Some rooms are safe havens, retreats, and almost sacred. When people are in your room they really see you. You become a little more vulnerable than usual. No hiding. 

In this moment I was suddenly aware of how important it was for me to open up my room to everyone that night. I wasn't even thinking about what it would feel like while I was cleaning earlier in the day. All I was thinking about was how in the world we were going to fit everyone in our apartment and what they were going to see.

The past few weeks I've been replaying this feeling in my mind. A part of me felt so much joy and an interesting closeness to our team. Another part of me was resisting the urge to build some really quick walls to hide vulnerability. This was my insecurity, my deep desire to be accepted and liked. 

Before Mike and I moved to Texas I thought church planting would be long nights, long talks, lots of cooking, and an endless amount of dishes. I am learning that these things are certainly apart of church planting, but it is not all that it is. 

Church planting is mostly about opening up your room to a bunch of people. 

Its about vulnerability, being real, and living with people. It is about sharing your struggles and victories. Its about letting the real and living Gospel show up through you no matter how messy it may look. 

Its about deciding to open up the doors of your room.

Its about letting people in. 

It is about letting Jesus in. 

I think that vulnerability may be an endless battle that rages inside of my mind and my heart. I will probably be working on insecurity issues until I am like 80 years old. But I don't want to ever give up on fighting that battle because its in vulnerability where we find Jesus. And I so want him in my room. 

So let them see my mix matched pillow cases! Let them see my empty walls! Let them see my dirty dishes! Welcoming people to my life, and to the heart of the Gospel is of more importance than looking pretty. So come on in, the doors are open. 

The Graduate

So I received my diploma in the mail the other day. I could hardly breathe as I opened the package. I think I remember myself hopping up and down in a parking lot as I ripped it open. I had waited and worked a long time for that piece of paper. That small moment in the parking lot was so personally important. It was not the traditional graduate moment in a hat and gown, hearing my name called, and walking across a stage, but it was my moment. I don't think I'll ever forget it.

I officially finished classes around the same time we moved out to Texas. There was so much going on in those few months before our move. My last semester I worked like a robot. I didn't take it in, I just worked. This past week I have had some time to think back on my college experience. It was a pretty untraditional road, but I met so many amazing people and learned so many different things. I went to four schools and pursued three different majors. Yeah... I was that kid. I didn't have it all figured out then...but I can't say that I have it all figured it now haha.

I want to remember so I decided to share some of my favorite memories and lessons. 


1. Toccoa Falls College (Major: Cross-Cultural Adult Education Minor: Ethnomusicology) 
  
- My ethnomusicology classes! One of my finals was listening to pieces of music and writing down the composer and time period. This is harder than it sounds. The first day of this class my professor told us that we didn't know how to listen to music and that he was going to teach us how...and he did. I also took a world music class that covered cultural music. We took a trip out to Emory in Atlanta to play an ancient gong instrument that was played in Emporers' palaces in Asia. I remember we had to take our shoes off for the entire session out of respect. 

- There was a beautiful waterfall on campus. Some people said that a Native American princess committed suicide by jumping off of the falls. It was the classic Romeo and Juliet legend. She apparently had a lover from a rival tribe that she could not be with. 

-My Hmong friends! This was a beautiful community of students at Toccoa. They introduced me to Pho for the first time. It was the best soup I had ever had. 

- A girls dorm. I remember getting used to living with all girls. It was very intense at times, but other times is was so much fun! I didn't grow up with sisters, but I gained some during that time. 


2. Kennesaw State University (Major: Art Education)

- Studio Classes! I took several art studio classes like drawing and 2D design. I had never thought I was much of a drawer, but I learned that it could be taught. I loved everything about these classes. I always had some kind of chalk or paint on my hands. We worked on easels the whole class period in rustic studios that smelled like paint. I learned how to look at things differently. I learned how to pay attention to light, detail, and composition. The art department was a different world. The students had wild hair and interesting vocabulary. They were experimental and honest. It was refreshing. 

-Nude Models. Yes one of my classes required us to draw nude models. We were learning how to draw the human form. I remember the first class, I probably turned five different shades of red. I learned how to open my eyes in this class. Believe it or not, there is something so deeply amazing when you can draw the perfect curve of a shoulder or even a facial expression. I remember being grateful and amazed at the way that God created every detail of the human body. 

-Art History! I am in love with art history. In these classes we studied works of art, technique, and how art is one of the greatest indicators of a culture and time. 

- Independence. I learned how to enjoy being by myself during this time. I loved being able to navigate unknown and sometimes uncomfortable territory. I loved all the different people that I met and how they didn't believe like I did. I found out what I believe. It stretched me for the better. I feel like I became more relevant in those few semesters. 


3. Columbus State University (Major: Business) 

-Married, Commuter Student. I learned about the challenges of being married and still going to college. It is possible if you stick to your guns! 

-Planning ahead. I learned the art of planning ahead. I drove an hour to school and was in full time ministry. 


4. Ohio Christian University (Major: Business Management)

- Perseverance even if no one is looking! Online school is a different world. You don't see your classmates or professors and sometimes you feel a little alone. But it is doable and works out for the hermit perfectionist types like me haha. 

- A love for meaningful business. I learned that business can really make an impact on the world. I believe that God can use it to accomplish His purposes. 

- Quiet Celebration. I learned that some of my accomplishments would only be seen and felt by me. It was important for me to acknowledge those wins and keep going. 



There is so much more that I could probably say about my college experience. It was unique, long, lonely, challenging, exciting, and worth it. It was mine. 

I am thankful for my parents for being patient and supportive through all of my changes. 
I am thankful for my husband for reminding that I am more than what I do in school, for seeing my hard work and my wins, and for being my consistent cheerleader especially during online education. 

Advent Calendar Giveaway Winner!!!

The time has come to announce the Advent Calendar Giveaway Winner! I wanted to thank you all for making this so much fun! I am so grateful for all of the calendar orders and for those who shared the giveaway with their friends. I hope that everyone has an exciting and meaningful Advent season! 

I currently have two more calendars for sale. Please let me know if you would like to purchase one!

Advent Calendar Giveaway!

For the past few weeks I have been furiously working on a new project for the holiday season. I am honestly proud of myself for thinking about the holidays before the month of November. Planning ahead is not one of my personal strengths, so this is a win! 

Over the past few months I have come across several online crafters and artists who are designing and printing Advent calendars for the month of December. Their calendars are jaw- dropping magnificent, but I found I can't afford them.

So I decided to make my own.

 

"If you can't buy it, make it. " 

The word 'Advent' means  "the arrival of a notable person, thing or event..." Those who celebrate Advent, celebrate the coming of Christ into the world. As I was reading, designing, and painting I fell more and more in love with this idea. I found that Advent is so much more than celebrating the event of Christ's birth. It is also about celebrating all that he brought with Him as he came to dwell among us for a while. He brought with Him peace, joy, salvation, hope, life, victory, light, and commonality.

I am reminded that Christ chose to be vulnerable by coming to Earth as a man. Christ is a picture of hospitality because he came to Earth to feel what we feel, and to see what we see, so that we could know Him and feel comfortable to be apart of His family. We always feel a little more comfortable with those who have gone through what we have. Christ wanted to bring salvation, but I also think he wanted to achieve common ground. 

So He chose to be human. He came to our level.

We can talk about being a kid with Jesus, because He was one at one time. 

We can talk about sorrow, hurt, betrayal, and pain, because He experienced it first hand. 

We can talk about deep friendship, being hungry, being tired, beauty, telling stories, and laughing at jokes because he experienced and saw and heard and touched some of the same things that we have. I imagine that he loved it all because He knew we would feel closer to Him and vice versa. 

Christ's vulnerability brought commonality!

This is why I am in love with Jesus. 

I thought I would celebrate this truth by having an:

Advent Calendar Giveaway! 

#adventgiveaway2014

The winner will be chosen at random, and will receive my handmade Advent calendar. The calendar consists of 25 scripture cards for each day in the month of December.

 

Each print contains a design on the front and a scripture to read for that day on the back. There is also a place to jot down some meaningful notes for the day.  

How to Enter:

1. Follow The Well DFW Instagram account 

@thewelldfw

2. Like The Well DFW Facebook page at 

www.facebook.com/TheWellDFW

3. Repost my Advent Calendar Giveaway Instagram post and tag me in it

 @katie_gerald 

&

#adventgiveaway2014

The giveaway ends on November 22 at midnight. So enter soon!

Results will be posted on Instagram, Facebook, and my blog on November 23. 

If you would like to purchase an Advent Calendar for $15 please email me at gerald_katie@yahoo.com. Get your order in soon!

Top 5 Instagram Treasures

So I have stumbled upon an Instagram treasure trove that I wanted to share. These are just a few inspirational people and companies that I am following right now. Check them out and follow them!

1. @shereadstruth 

She Reads Truth is an "online community of women who study God's Word together". Their website is managed by a group of women who write genuine and relevant devotional plans.They also collaborate with artists who design beautiful devotional books, prints, and so much more! It is my favorite website right now. They also have an app available! I am currently going through their study on Hospitality and it is rocking my world. Check them out at www.shereadstruth.com !

2. @naptimediaries

Naptime Diaries is a family owned print and design shop that sells colorful scripture prints, canvases and more for your home! Jess Connolly is founder, a mom, an artist, and a fellow church planter's wife! Check out her shop at www.naptimediariesshop.com and her blog at  www.naptimediaries.com/blog. I recently purchased one of her printable bundles and I am in love! 

3. @lilyasher

LilyAsher is a shop that sells beautiful handmade button earrings. This beautiful idea and business originated in Tulsa, OK by Kim Gottsacker. Check her out at www.lilyasher.com!

4. @miriamdesigns

Miriam Designs sells "handmade & hope-filled goods." Gracie Moakler and her team create beautiful pieces of jewelry. Mike bought me their compass necklace for my birthday this year. Check out their website at www.miriam-designs.com. They just came out with a fall sweater line! 

5. @thelittlecraftshow

The Little Craft Show is an indie craft market in the midwest. Their Instagram features so many lovely and interesting artists and crafters. I so wish I lived closer to their venue! Check them out at www.thelittlecraftshow.com! 

Christ. Beat. Fear

"I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but rather the assessment that something else is more important than fear." - Franklin D. Roosevelt

Fear has always gone straight to my stomach. I feel it and look immediately for any exit doors available. The bathroom...the back door...the car (with keys). I have always been a pretty quiet person, I like quiet safe places. I like whites, blues, clean smells, cool spaces. I like my British movies (Downton Abbey), mashed potatoes and my softest socks. I like my closest people around me and planned days with details like when, what, who, why...etc. 

Does this sound crazy? Would I completely annoy you? Maybe...

I like safe, and hate fear. Fear makes me mad. Fear can take things from me. It can take my experiences, my sight, my blessings, my lessons. 

But Christ beat fear.

 I think he beat it that night on the Mount of Olives before He was crucified.

 "He withdrew from them about a stone's throw away (He was near his closest friends), knelt down, and began to pray. 'Father, if You are willing, take this cup away from Me- nevertheless, not My will, but Yours, be done.' 

Sometimes I wonder if Jesus felt it in his stomach the same way that I do. I wonder how long it took him to say ..."nevertheless, not my will, but Yours, be done." But he prayed and valiantly held onto a cause, a promise, a reason, a power that undermines the grip of fear of every time. I think it was in this moment Christ beat fear with His courage. Jesus believed that closeness with humanity was far more important than the events that he would experience in the next few hours... and I think He knew exactly what would happen in these next few hours. 

Could I be as selfish as to ask if I crossed His mind in this moment? Did He know that His triumph in a quiet garden would give me the strength to do scary things in this life?  Did he do this with my freedom in mind? 

All I can say is that my beautiful Savior is boldly and unselfishly courageous.

The past few weeks I have had some interesting encounters with fear. It has crept up beside me in unexpected moments. My husband and I just moved from Georgia (my home) to Texas to plant a church. I feel the stir, the call, the pull to accomplish what God has asked us to do, but sometimes I also feel the apprehension, the fear, and the smallness that comes with something so bigger than me and so new. But I am reminded tonight that Christ has gone before me in this. I know that He knows about fear and that He pushed through for something more important...for me and for you. 

The honest truth is that I will most likely feel fear every now and again. Like when I drive on these enormous Texas highways, when I open up my heart and my home to strangers, when I interview for a completely new job, when my husband and I work to create the foundation of a church that doesn't exist yet, or even when I stay in our apartment alone while Mike is away. I will probably turn for those exit doors and consider excuses to get out of things. But what I do know is that if Christ beat fear for a worthy cause, I can do the same. Because of Him, I have the freedom to pursue what is most important without being paralyzed by fear. 

And for this I am truly grateful.

This beautiful graphic is by Jenny of French Press Mornings. Check her out at http://frenchpressmornings.com/2014/10/encouraging-wednesdays-deuteronomy-316/.